Conde-Remonsellez Family Journey

Happy Valentine’s Day

2011-02-01T20:25:00.002-02:00

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Dear Family & Friends

February is the month of love, but there are so many types of love. The love I will be writing about is that which I have for you, my family and friends. I am so thankful for each and every one of you. You are a blessing in our lives.

I wanted to write this letter at Christmas time, but as the month sped by, it occurred to me how many other cards and letters you would receive and how busy you would be and the probability of you reading my letter were slim. So this idea of a Christmas, New Year, & Happy Valentine letter came to mind for me to share what wonderful things God has done in 2010.

As many of you know, 2010 had a rocky beginning with chemotherapy treatments, surgeries, radiation, more surgeries and in my mind a blur of practically everything that took place from January through July. It was a very rough time with chemo and the adverse reactions. I was not very sick but in a great deal of pain and from what I am now told, I had steroid rage and wasn't a nice person to be around most days. As a family we had our ups and downs but are grateful for this experience because it drew us closer as a whole family.

My mother in law, Nelly came from Chile and was with us for over 7 months helping me with my diet and making me much more health conscious. She gave me massages, foot rubs, and babied me through my most difficult moments. To her, I am forever indebted and thankful. My husband took off from work many days to take me to treatments, countless doctor appointments and has made a habit now of dropping me off at the door and picking me up at the door. Such chivalry has made me fall further in love with him. My mom and dad of course also played a huge part in our lives, helping with Emma, her schoolwork, and taking me to radiation treatments an hour away for 6 weeks straight.

Everyone that stuck to my side offered encouragement and lifted me up in prayer when I couldn't find the strength to do it myself, to you I am appreciative. Thank you is not sufficient. Even my family and friends in Chile would call, Facebook, and message me when they caught wind I was down. But the one who sustained me most was God and His words in the Bible written "just for me."

I read the book A Shepherd's Look at Psalm 23 by Philip Keller, three times and each time found comfort with how much my Savior cares for me and goes to great length to protect me. This chapter in Psalms became so dear to me, my mom made a gorgeous cross stitch of it to hang over my bed. I have scriptures clipped to lampshades, taped to my television, written on construction paper and taped to the wall. Surrounding me and putting myself under the influence of God's word was part of my cancer treatment.

Our family took two vacations, one in summer and one before Christmas. The first trip was right after my chemo with Pablo, Emma, Nelly, and Sweetie (our pug) to Helen, GA. A dear friend of my mother, named Helen, offered us a cabin where I was able to recuperate, go tubing, and walk 1 mile straight up to Ruby Falls. I was so proud of myself for making it all the way to the top. This was something very challenging for me in my physical state but I MADE IT! We relaxed and swam in a nearby lake while Pablo tried to fish - with no luck I might add, read God's word as a family, and drew ever closer still.

Nelly had to go home to take care of her mother in September, who was being cared for by my best friend in Chile, Sussy. I know it wasn't easy for either of them but want to thank Abuela Abuela for lending me Nelly and thank Sussy for the hard work she put into caring for Abuela Abuela. Without the cooperation of the two, I wouldn't have had the blessing of Nelly's care. I miss her dearly, as she became not just my mother in law but my 2^nd mother, friend, and confidant.

Well this brings us to Christmas which we (My Mom & Dad, Pablo, Emma, Me, Sweetie & my parent's dog, Betty Boop) went back to Helen to enjoy Helen, GA's first White Christmas in 100 years. It was a blast watching Emma see her first snow, make a snowman and snow angel, and enjoy snowball fights. The day after Christmas we headed out in the snow storm to Pigeon Forge, TN where we were slammed with inclement weather. The trip should have taken 2 hours but instead took 6. Needless to say, there were terrible traffic jams and 5 wrecks along the way. Once we arrived we enjoyed our time at Dollywood, shopping in town and going to the outlet.

For New Year's Eve we got home and Pablo, Emma and I went to our friend's house for dinner, a little bit of celebrating, and talking by the fire pit until we rung in the New Year. It was great fun and we got to make even more new friends.

What I have left for last is probably the most amazing thing that happened in 2010, I am officially in remission. Now for a stage IV breast cancer patient that does not mean I am cured because the cancer will come back. What it means for me though is it's gone for right now, today and if there is anything I have learned through this journey it is to live every day to the maximum, share my faith with others and make God look good, a lesson recently learned from attending Calvary Chapel Melbourne. How good does He look right now with me in remission? I know this beast will come back but I know my God can keep it asleep for a very long time and that is my prayer.

To conclude, my dear family and friends - thank you for making 2010 a year where you remembered me in your prayers. They were answered, but continue to pray for me as I continue treatments to keep my cancer in remission. They are powerful drugs that I'm taking and the side effects include much pain and fatigue. I love you all and thank you for the love you have poured out on me and my family.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY,

Adrienne, Pablo & Emma

P.S. To follow, you will find a link to my American Cancer Society Relay for Life Team: Butterflies of Hope. It would honor me greatly if you went to my page and made a donation in my name or of that of a friend or family member that has won the battle, is still fighting or lost their battle to cancer. If you decide to mail a check, please send to my home address made out to "American Cancer Society." It is my dream and prayer that a cure would be found for this terrible disease. For more information on what the American Cancer Society does, please log onto my page http://main.acsevents.org/goto/aconde
where you will find a link, to copy and paste in your browser, that leads you to more specific information.

American Cancer Society:

Saving lives by helping people stay well,

get well, find cures, and fight back!

Keep in Touch

1423 Sorento Cir.; W. Melbourne, FL 32904 * 321-544-9361 Adrienne's Cell * 321-506-7991 Pablo's Cell *
adrienneconde@hotmail.com

Happy THANKSGIVING

2010-11-21T23:58:00.002-02:00

It is so easy to praise God when things go your way but in the midst of your trials, illnesses, circumstances, do you praise God with the same gusto? This question popped into my mind as so many praises poured into my Facebook, e-mail, and phone. It’s hard to admit but I didn’t have the same reaction at hearing my test results on Friday, as I did when I heard that the chemotherapy had done nothing and that my cancer had actually grown during the treatment. I think that reaction is human.

I realized through with this good news, I need to learn to “praise Him in the storm” AND where I am today. I am so happy right now to be cancer free and give God the glory. My cancer is one that will come back in time, so continue to pray for me and that if and when it does come back, I can praise Him even then.

Thank you for you prayers and may this Thanksgiving be a time where you do not obsess about cooking the perfect turkey, getting to watch your favorite football team play in a bowl, stress over your in-laws, or anything else but that you would focus on being thankful for even the little things God is doing in your life.

Happy Fall

2010-10-29T19:48:00.001-02:00

So much has happened in so little time. I guess that is why cancer can be so overwhelming but with God I haven't felt that way lately. I had to change the Arimidex I was taking. My doctor gave me two samples of other medications that do the same thing but may not cause the side effects. I'm to try them for two weeks each and then choose which one fits me best. I am praying one of them will be the "one". I also had blood drawn for the research study I'm participating in. If you haven't heard about this yet I found it through the "Army of Women" website I asked my girlfriends to join. I'm also going to participate in another study through Moffitt Cancer Center for patients taking Zometa. I take my first dose of this medicine next Friday, November 5^th. I'm going to get an MRI of my back as the area that was radiated has started to cause me pain again and a PET SCAN to see if my cancer has spread anywhere else, shrunk or whatever. I'm scheduled November 24^th, the day before Thanksgiving, for surgery to get my expander put in on my right breast and start stretching the skin so I can get my right booby by January or February 2011. LOL- YEAH!!! WOW was that enough info. For one posting or what?!?! Do me a favor- in this crazy world we're living in where Halloween gets more importance than Thanksgiving- STOP and take a moment to thank God with your family for all the many blessings we all have in our lives: A Savior, family, friends, a roof over our heads, clothes on our backs, a church to worship God, vehicles to get us from point A to point B, food in abundance that fill our tables, you fill in the rest…

Psalm 28:7 The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.

Mi “Nuevo” Normal

2010-10-29T19:19:00.001-02:00

No puedo creer que ha pasado tanto tiempo desde mi último posteo y por eso pido disculpas. La radiación me pateó en el trasero más fuerte de lo que pensé que iba a ser. Pero eso también ya pasó. El 30 de Septiembre tuve una histerectomía radical para reducir los niveles de progesterona y estrógeno en mi cuerpo. Me siento muy bien y me he recuperado increíblemente rápido. El propósito de esta última operación es matar de hambre al cáncer, ya que estas hormonas son las que lo alimentan. La esperanza es que esto erradique las lesiones y el cáncer restante. ¡Esa es la idea! También he comenzado a tomar un inhibidor aromatase llamado "Armidex". Este medicamento, tomado a diario, es para eliminar las hormonas restantes. Tendré que tomar este medicamento de por vida o hasta que se encuentre una cura. Comencé a tomarlo anoche y me ha producido bastante nausea pero esto es normal los primeros días, y debiera pasar.

Bueno, ¿Qué más ha cambiado? ¡BASTANTE! Con la ayuda de Dios y las oraciones de una multitud de personas, más de las que puedo imaginar, cada día estoy más fuerte. Por todas estas oraciones estoy muy agradecida.

Nelly
Mi suegra regresó a Chile el martes 12 de octubre. Fue muy duro verla irse y lloré por lo menos una media hora de regreso a casa de Miami pero al mismo tiempo marca un nuevo comienzo. Nunca volveré a ser la misma persona que era antes, soy una mejor versión emocionalmente y espiritualmente pero físicamente no volveré a estar a un 100%. Prefiero esta versión de mí. Nelly tiene una gran responsabilidad en los cambios que he hecho porque ella estuvo dispuesta a ser la vasija de Dios.
Me he convertido en una vegetariana y he cambiado mis hábitos alimenticios y de ejercicio radicalmente. De repente como carne que ha sido criado libre de pesticidas etc., pero es increíble que ya no necesito mucho. Los alimentos que estoy colocando dentro del templo del Espíritu Santo son aquellos que sé que me harán más fuerte y saludable y me siento muuuucho mejor por esto. Sé que no es para todos, pero sí lo es para mí. Cuando oro, pidiendo la bendición por mis alimentos, realmente lo digo de corazón. Estoy agradecida por los alimentos que estoy consumiendo y le pido a Dios que los use para hacerme más fuerte.

He tenido que retomar las responsabilidades de cocinar, lavar, hacer el aseo, etc. Todas esas tareas en las que he sido mimada durante estos últimos 7 meses. Sé que Dios me dará la fortaleza para hacerlas y si no, ¡Qué más da! Ya hecho de menos la amistad y compañía de Nelly, pero en esta área también ya es tiempo de re-enganchar con mi mejor amigo, Pablo. He echado de menos nuestras citas y románticos escapes de fines de semanas. Este año ha sido pesado para los dos, asique, por favor estén orando por nosotros durante este tiempo de transición y de volver a conocernos.

Iglesia
Pablo y yo, después de mucha oración, por fin tomamos la decisión de dejar nuestra iglesia de los últimos 5 años. Era el tiempo perfecto para nuestra familia, ya que tengo la suficiente fuerza para asistir todas las semanas. Hubo muchas razones detrás de esta decisión, que prefiero no mencionar, y no se tomó sin primero orar mucho. Hemos estado asistiendo a Capilla Calvario por las últimas seis semanas y ha sido un cambio tremendo, especialmente para esta Sra. Bautista. Ha sido refrescante y las enseñanzas del Pastor Mark me han alimentado espiritualmente después de tantos meses de no asistir a ninguna iglesia regularmente. ¡Es increíble para mí lo hambrienta que he estado! Emma también está aprendiendo mucho en su clase del Mundo Pequeño.

Todavía no nos hemos unido a ningún grupo de cuidado pero sí estoy asistiendo al grupo de apoyo para cáncer mamario, "Mujeres de Esperanza", cada primer y tercer lunes del mes. A través de este ministerio he conocido a una mujer recientemente diagnosticada, a la cual estoy ministrando, llevándole almuerzos. Por fin estoy en una etapa donde puedo comenzar a devolver una porción de lo que me fue dado a mí, con tanto cariño, (nunca olvidaré a las mujeres de la Primera Iglesia Bautista de Eau Gallie quienes nos ministraron a mí y a mi familia). El nombre de mi nueva amiga es Kirsten. Tiene 38 años, está casada, y es madre de dos. Una niñita de 8 meses y un niño de 2 años. Por favor manténganla en sus oraciones, ya que recién está comenzando sus tratamientos. En estos momentos necesita fuerza y la dirección del Espíritu Santo a medida que va creciendo en una relación más cercana con Dios.

Pechugas
La semana que viene me voy a juntar con el cirujano plástico para conversar acerca de cuándo voy a tener mi cirugía para colocar mi implante derecho. No sé si va a requerir extender la piel o si aún tengo suficiente, después de la infección al principio de mi tratamiento de quimioterapia. Les avisaré cuando va a ser esa cirugía.

Nuevo Normal

Como mencioné antes, nunca seré la misma, pero eso es algo positivo. Como ha reiterado mi líder del grupo de apoyo, nunca volveré a ser igual, pero eso es algo positive, cada día me acercaré más y más a mi "nuevo" normal. Le doy gracias a Jesús por los cambios que ha hecho en mí:

Estar agradecida de corazón por cada día, sin dar nada por hecho.
Servirle a Él.
Obedecer Sus mandamientos.
Aferrarme a Las promesas que me ha dado en Su Palabra.
Testificar con denuedo a través de mi cáncer.
Dar testimonio y la Gloria a Dios por donde estoy Hoy.
Pensar positivo a pesar de mis condiciones diarias.
Despertar con Jesús en mis pensamientos.
Amar a mis seres queridos y hacer el amor como si no existiera un mañana.
Valorar y atesorar mis amistades.
Dejarle a mi hija un legado de una mujer a la quien ella pueda luchar por imitar, una que ¡Vive solamente para Dios!

Es MI oración por ti y por todos aquellos que oran por mí, que aprendan estas mismas lecciones sin tener que ser golpeados con algo tan fuerte como el cáncer. Hasta la próxima…

Proverbios 3:5-6

"Fíate de Jehová de todo corazón y no te apoyes en tu propia prudencia. Reconócelo en todos tus caminos y Él enderezará tus veredas".

The “New” Normal

2010-10-14T20:39:00.001-02:00

I can't believe it has been so long since my last posting & for that I apologize. Radiation kicked me in the butt a lot harder than I thought it would. But that too is now over. On September 30^th I had a radical hysterectomy to reduce the levels of progesterone & estrogen in my body. I feel great and have healed incredibly fast. Because these are the foods my cancer feed on, making them starve will hopefully eradicate the lesions and cancer that are left. That is the idea! I have also started taking what is called an aromatase inhibitor called "Arimidex." This medication taken daily is to eliminate all other hormones left over. I will have to take this for life or until there is a cure. I started taking this last night and it's made me quite nauseas but this is expected the first few days and should subside.

So, what else has changed? PLENTY! I am getting stronger each day with God's help and as the result of a multitude beyond what I can imagine, that keep me in their prayers. For them, I am so very thankful.

Nelly

My mother-in-law returned to Chile on Tuesday. It was really hard to see her leave and I cried for a good half hour on our way home from Miami but at the same time it marks a new beginning. I will never be the same person I was before, I am a better version emotionally and spiritually yet physically I will never be 100%. I prefer this version of me. Nelly is greatly responsible for the changes I have made because she was willing to be God's vessel.

I have become a vegetarian and radically changed my eating habits and exercise. I do eat free-range meats occasionally but it's amazing how I no longer crave these. The foods I am putting into the Holy Spirit's temple are those things I know will make me stronger and healthier and I feel soooo much better for it. I know it's not for everyone but it is for me. When I say grace, I really mean it. I'm thankful for the foods I am consuming and I ask God to use them to make me stronger.

I have also had to resume cooking, washing, cleaning, etc. all things I have been spoiled with these past 7 months. I know the Lord will give me the stamina to do these things and if not, OH WELL! My OCD will have to "deal with it" and move on. I already miss Nelly's friendship and companionship but in this area too it is time for me to re-engage with my best friend, Pablo. I have missed our date nights and romantic weekend get-a-ways. This year has put a toll on us both, so please pray as we make this transition of getting to know each other again.

Church

Pablo & I finally decided to leave our church home of the past 5 years after much prayer. It was the perfect time for our family as I am now strong enough to attend each week. There were many reasons behind this decision, which I prefer to not discuss and it didn't come without much prayer. We have been attending Calvary Chapel for the past six weeks and it has been a huge change, especially for this Baptist girl. It has been refreshing and Pastor Mark's teachings have fed me spiritually after so many months of not attending any church regularly. It is amazing to me how hungry I have been! Emma is learning a lot in her Sunday school class too.

We have not yet joined a life group but I am attending the breast cancer support group "Women of Hope" every 1^st and 3^rd Mondays of the month. Through this ministry I have met a recently diagnosed woman I am now ministering to by taking meals. I am finally at a point where I can give back a portion of what has been so graciously given to me (I will never forget the ladies at Eau Gallie First Baptist Church who ministered to me and my family). My new friend's name is Kirsten. She is 38 years old, married, and a mother of 2, an 8 mo. old little girl and a 2 year old boy. Please keep her in your prayers as she is just starting her treatments. She needs strength right now and the Holy Spirit's guidance as she grows closer to a relationship with God.

Boobies

This coming week I meet with my plastic surgeon to discuss when I will have surgery to have my right implant placed. I don't know yet if I will require an extender or if I have enough skin left after my infection early on in my chemo treatments to make have the implant place immediately. I'll let you know that and when that surgery will be.

Making Strides Against Breast Cancer & Relay for Life

October 23^rd is the BC walk. I have joined the Spice Rack for this event and would appreciate any donations made on my behalf. I can't wait to walk with my breast friends and family. LOL! As for my Relay for Life, which is also a part of the American Cancer Society, I have taken on new responsibilities for this year. I am leading my Butterflies of Hope, am the registration chair, and the ACS Can Chair, Pablo is the advertising & media chair and of course, Mom & Dad are right next to me supporting me in each area.

I am currently looking for new Butterflies to join me and for the return of my 2010 Butterflies. The kick-off for Relay season is Nov. 7^th and I have been chosen to give the survivor story testimony. I am amazed, grateful, and humbled by how God continues to bless me and use me to further His message of hope and healing both physically and spiritually.

New Normal

As I mentioned before, I will never be the same but this is a positive thing. As my support group leader has reiterated, I will get closer and closer each day to my "new" normal. I thank Jesus for the changes He has made in me:

To be heart-felt thankful for each day- taking NOTHING for granted
To serve Him
To obey His commands
To cling tightly to the promises He has given me in His Word
To witness boldly through my cancer
To testify & give God the glory for where I am today
To think positively despite my daily condition
To wake up with Jesus on my mind
To love my loved ones and make love like there is no tomorrow
To cherish my friendships
To leave my daughter a legacy of a woman she strives to be like, one who lives for God and God alone!

It is MY prayer for you and all those who keep me in their prayers that you would learn these same lessons without having to be hit up-side the head with something as sobering as cancer is. Until next time…

Trust in the LORD with all your heart,

and lean not on your own understanding.

In all you ways acknowledge Him and

He WILL direct your paths."

Prov. 3:5-6

Prayer requested & FUNDRAISER for a very close friend!!

2010-07-24T18:45:00.000-02:00

LATEST UPDATE: Felipe is out of surgery and in the ICU for 24 hours due to length of the surgery. Please continue to pray for his continued healing and for the money they need to raise. If you'd like to participate, please let me know.

Paulo Serrano is Pablo's best friend from Chile who lives in Sarasota, FL. He write about his younger brother.

FIRST BLOG:

Dear Family and Friends,

We are sending this letter on behalf of Felipe (“Pipe”), Paulo’s younger brother, who lives in Chile and is currently facing some serious medical challenges. Most of you know Pipe personally or have met him during his visits with us here in the States. You know Pipe’s huge heart, contagious joy, and steadfast faith.

As many of you know, Pipe has always had a medical condition known as Hereditary Multiple Osteochondromas, which has caused him to have multiple surgeries to remove benign tumors since he was a young child. When we were visiting Chile this summer, it was determined that one of these tumors in Pipe’s left leg (which grew very large in a short amount of time) was, in fact, malignant. Further testing also found additional tumors in his lung and rib cage. After visiting his doctor and having numerous tests run, Pipe was given a 10% chance of keeping his left leg, due to the tumor’s size and compromised nerves, etc. In addition, he was told that the cancer had most likely metastasized to his lung (as this is common with this type of femoral tumor). Of course, this left Pipe and the entire family devastated and relying quickly on our hope in Christ Jesus. At this point, many of you were praying fervently for Pipe and his situation at hand.

Well, on July 9th, Pipe went to visit a new doctor who specializes in osteochondromas in order to get a second opinion. This physician looked at the test results and immediately determined that Pipe’s leg could, in fact, be saved and that he would be able to walk following removal of the tumor. In addition, he indicated that the tumors in Pipe’s chest were not malignant and most likely previous osteochondromas that he has had for some time. Praise the Lord!!

Pipe will be undergoing surgery to remove the tumor in his leg on Saturday, July 24th. Pipe and the family now face the challenge of finding the resources to pay for the cost of a titanium “proximal femur megaprosthesis” that will be implanted during the surgery to avoid amputation of his leg, as well as part of the surgery itself. The current estimate after the portion to be covered by insurance is about $6,000.00 US dollars. This is far less than previous figures and although it seems like an insurmountable amount (especially in Chile), we know that God has already begun to prove Himself in this situation and will work out these details, as well.

We are sending this letter to inform you of Pipe’s circumstance and hope you will all join us in praying for healing, grace, comfort, and peace for Pipe in the days ahead. If any of you feel you would like to contribute financially toward the cost of Pipe’s medical expenses, we are enclosing our address where you can send any donations and we will forward them on to Chile.

Thank you for the support and encouragement that so many of you have shown already. We love and appreciate each and everyone of you!!

With hope in Him,

Paulo and Carmen Serrano
213 San Luis St.
North Port, FL 34287

July 23 at 1:31pm

I would like to ask a great favor my dear friends—my brother Felipe, "Pipe", will be having a highly complex surgery, tomorrow, Saturday, July 24 at 9:30 AM at the Clínica Tabancura in Santiago, Chile. I ask that you´d be praying that our God can guide the hands of Dr. Luis Bahamonde and his team, and also that Pipe may have a fast recovery, both physically and emotionally.

Thank you so much,
Paulo

Les quiero pedir un favor muy grande amigos—mi hermano Felipe, “Pipe” va a ser sometido a una cirugía de una alta complejidad, mañana sábado, 24 de julio a las 9:30 AM en la Clínica Tabancura, Santiago, Chile. Les pido oración para que nuestro Dios guíe las manos de Dr. Luis Bahamonde y su equipo, y también para que Felipe pueda tener una recuperación rápida, tanto en lo físico, como en lo emocional.

Muchísimas gracias
Paulo

The New Scoop

2010-07-22T15:16:00.001-02:00

After much deliberation between oncologists both here and at Moffitt Cancer Center it has been decided to do 25 radiation treatments on my left chest wall where my cancer originated. The side effects are minimal from what I am told and I should start to gain strength each day. This is good news because I feel like a Mac truck has run over me, then backed up and ran over me again. I'm a little scared of radiation and all the long term effects it will leave on my body, as I see what chemotherapy has done. OK, I'm more than a little scared, I'm a lot scared but I must imagine myself holding my Heavenly Father's hand like a little girl holds onto her daddy's hand when she's scared. The machine is so daunting and the "what if's" crawl into your brain.

At this point I don't really have many options. This too is something I struggle with. How much are the doctor's playing God? How much medicine is too much? For someone in my position, I think this is something we ask ourselves. At least I do. It's so hard making these life altering decisions on what treatments to do and only I can make the final decisions. Only I know how much is enough. Not that I'm quitting any time soon. It's just too much to think about most of the time. Do you understand even a little bit? I'm tired and think that's the biggest issue I'm facing right now. I think I may be a little depressed or down too. I just wish I felt up to doing everything I write down on my "to do" lists each evening for the next day. Writing this blog for example is something I've been wanting to do, but I just couldn't get my heart into it. I'm in a funk! Okay!

We had a wonderful time on vacation in Helen, Georgia. We stayed at a friend's cabin, went tubing twice down the Chatahoochee River (yes, I went tubing!), climbed/walked uphill 0.4 miles to Anna Ruby Falls, went swimming in a gorgeous lake, walked downtown almost every evening, saw a youth mission's group perform, talked, laughed, ate, and slept like a log. Pablo, of course, went fishing and perfected his fly fishing skills. He caught several trout and let them go on their merry way. I had wanted to visit some friends but was just way too exhausted. That's a lot of action for someone who just finished chemo but it was a blast! I know Emma will never forget it nor will I. Hopefully we'll go again soon but not too soon- 10 hours in the car is a bit much to do right away. (Thanks Helen for our time in Helen.)

So back to treatments, I do my 25 radiation treatments and then I'll begin hormone therapy. The doctors will know in about 3 to 6 mo. if this is working or not. I'll be having my ovaries removed sometime in between too and as far as reconstruction is concerned, who knows? I think that has moved to dead last on my list of priorities. Who cares if I have one fake boob and one flat chest! I'll get around to it but I think the doctors are concentrating on my cancer right now… me, too.

Okay friends so are you caught up? Have I forgotten anything? If you have questions, write me. Even if you don't have questions, write me and let me know how you are doing. I will be glowing green and getting Emma ready for school and don't forget her 9^th birthday, August 12^th. For those who promised to send music for me to put on her mp3 mail it soon!

I love you guys!

Amigos les escribo para que estén orando por el delicado momento que está enfrentando Adriana. Les transcribo el mail que ella envió:

2010-07-01T20:46:00.000-02:00

Bueno, hoy fue mi ultimo tratamiento de quimioterapia y mi visita con el oncólogo trajo una sorpresa y una respuesta al siguiente paso a tomar. Como ya deben saber por mi ultimo blog, se hayó otra metastasis en mi espalda. Ahora mis médicos están haciendo una junta para decidir si van a hacer el tratamiento de radiación, ya que esto es un indicador claro de que el cancer se ha propagado a los huesos. Esto fue algo que el doctor me dejó más en claro.

La sorpresa llegó cuando comenzó a contarme acerca de la terapia hormonal que me van a hacer, a pesar de si me hacen el tratameitno de radiación o no, y será un tratamiento de por vida. Esta es la parte más importante del tratamiento y yo no sabía esto. Tampoco sabia que si el tratamiento no funciona, mi cancer es terminal. Esto fue una sorpresa para el doctor y para mi. Para mi, porque nadie me lo habia dicho, y para el doctor porque él pensaba que yo ya sabía eso. Obviamente esta noticia nos dejo a Pablo, mi mamá y a mi para dentro, pero no nos duró mucho rato ya que, Dios está en control! Nada ha cambiado, mi vida está 100% en las manos de Dios y debo confiar en El para mi día a día y para Su voluntad en mi vida. Lo que si depende de mi, es como uso cada uno de mis días para Su Gloria.

Proverbios 27:1 claramente me dice: "No te afanes por el mañana; Porqué no sabes que dará de sí el día." Y desde el principio de este peregrinaje mi meta ha sido poner en práctica lo que dice Proverbios 3: 5 y 6. "Fíate de Jehová de todo tu corazón, y no te apoyes en tu propia prudencia. Reconócelo en todos tus caminos, y El enderezará tus veredas."

¡Que promesa más increible!

Gracias,
Adriana Remonsellez Conde

Traduccion por Janet Curtis- Gracias tia te amo mucho.

Need Assistance in Instilling a Love for Worship thru Music

2010-06-29T01:59:00.002-02:00

Okay, here is my next project...I am asking all my friends to burn a CD of their kid's favorite Christian artist or band and mailing it to Emma. I've got a shuffle I want to upload them to with the hope of getting her hooked to Christian music. I am SOOOOO over Disney fluff/pop/love/senseless/brainwashing! She has been kinda down lately too. She senses something is up but is unsure what. So, could you also send a note of encouragement with a picture of who you are and how you know me. I think this is a really cool project but I NEED YOUR HELP! Please let me know you're in so I can send you the address.
Thanks for being a part of our lives,
Adrienne

T3, T9, T11-12 & Hormone Treatment

2010-06-28T18:24:00.002-02:00

Well today was my last chemo and my visit with my oncologist brought a surprise and answer to "what next?" As you should know from my last blog, another metastasis was found on my back. Now my doctors are convening to see if they are even going to do radiation because this is a clearer indicator that the cancer has spread to my bones. This was something that he made clearer.

The surprise came when he began to talk to me about the hormone therapy that I will start regardless of the radiation and will take the rest of my life. This is the most important part of my therapy; I didn't know that. I also didn't know that if this therapy does not work, my diagnosis is terminal. This was a surprise to both me and my doctor. For me, because no one had told me this before and for him, because he thought I knew. Needless to say Pablo, my mom and I were all taken back. But it didn't last, God is in control. Nothing has changed. My life is 100% in God's hands and I must trust Him for my every day and whatever His will is for my life. What is up to me is how I use each of these days to His glory.

Prov. 27:1 clearly tells me, "Don't worry about tomorrow, because you don't know what tomorrow will bring" and since the beginning of this journey I've made it appoint to do what Prov. 3:5-6 teaches me:

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all you ways acknowledge Him and He WILL direct your paths."

What an incredible promise!

Busco Sabiduría

2010-06-25T08:30:00.001-02:00

La sabiduría comienza por honrar al Señor; conocer al Santísimo es tener inteligencia.

Proverbios 9:10 (Dios Habla Hoy)

Mi proposito de cada día es honrar a Dios y también conocer el Padre Santísimo de manera más profunda. Puedo hacer esto atreves de leer sus palabra que El me ha dejado; perfectas para cada situación en que me encuentro. Esta forma de vivir es de un aventurera en búsqueda de la sabiduría.

Dios promete conceder mi de darme esto que más valor que cualquier otra cosa que yo puedo desear, nada se le puede comparar. Proverbios 8:11 Vale más sabiduría que piedras preciosas; ¡ni lo más deseable se le puede comparar!

Cada vez que me pongo a estudiar anoto los versículos que encuentro parecidos. Para mi es la mejor indicación que Dios me pueda dar.

"¡OYE, Adriana, esto es importante, hazlo!"

Y en cada blog voy a intentar anotar y comentar sobre lo que yo he encontrada y luego quiero que Uds. añaden lo que han aprendido, lo que Uds. piensan y lo que Uds. han aprendido de sus experiencias como Dios ha probado estas verdad y promesas

Este blog es simple, al igual que su escritora y aventurera y por eso te ruego que siempre mantengas tus ojos en Dios y no en mí. Es un hecho que te voy a fallar, Dios nunca te fallara.

Ladies Only!

2010-06-19T02:01:00.001-02:00

This evening is one of those weird and rare moments in our home when the house is being run by the ladies. Mom, Nelly, Emma, Me, Betty Boop (Chihuahua) and Sweetie (Pug) had a ladies night. We watched movies, got scared when we heard fireworks and thought they were gunshots, ate horrible, good stuff, laughed and hung out. Dad went to Miami to visit his mom whose health is failing and Pablo was in Lakeland for a work seminar. Emma just thought it was the coolest thing ever it was just us. Me, too.

We also went on a pleasant walk around the block and cleared my mind. I needed it you see. I got the preliminary report from my MRI I had on Monday and it now appears there are two lesions on my spine not one. They didn't see the second spot the first time around but in "retrospect" can see it now and it has gotten larger. What does this mean? Not a whole lot, except I'll need additional radiation to this second area of my spine. Please be in prayer over T3 and T9. The radiation should help with pain I experience and also to reduce the size of these lesions.

It's a roller coaster, life that is. I just wish I'd stay in the car at all times and stop getting out to complain, get myself worked up and all for what? The ride is still going to go on and I'm better off holding on to dear life to God and enjoy it. I do like a good roller coasters! What is my problem?

Any who…I love you guys and sure do wish you'd write more. Signing off after an adventurous day- Adrienne

Can it get any worse, Lord?

2010-06-11T22:56:00.000-02:00

To say this has been the worst of the worst would be a gross understatement. I have never felt so horrible in my life. Praise God I had my first Radiation Oncology appointment, so the dr. could see how bad I was. The appointment in and of itself was useless but they took me up to the infusion center and pumped me up with "feel good" medicine. What a difference. I am still taking the morphine and other stuff to manage but feel ten times better.

I covet your prayers and thank those who have been so consistent in lifting me up.

Love,
Adrienne

So Tired, So Tired

2010-06-08T20:51:00.001-02:00

I can't even begin to express how tired and fatigued I feel. This chemo causes neuropathy which basically expresses itself with tingling like my hands are trying to wake up after going to sleep. It feels like tiny prickly needles. The bottoms of my feet feel the same way which make it interesting to find comfortable shoes and ways to walk. I finished my third treatment and only have one more to go. I CAN'T wait! I can't wait for the break either. My prayer is I will be able to build up some strength before starting the radiation treatments. God has been good though and I haven't felt the extreme pain I felt with the first Abraxane treatment. I am able to get up and be around I'm just not the most energetic person to be around and am very capable to fall asleep in the middle of your conversation. LOL.

I've been reading this fiction book that has a lot of similarities with Pilgrim's Progress. Obviously it's a modern version and although I don't completely agree with the doctrine, it is a fiction book that has brought to life again what our relationship with God should be. Trusting God, knowing Him and gaining understanding. How appropriately it fit with our family's memory verse for the week: Proverbs 9:10 If you really want to become wise, you must begin with having respect for the Lord. To know the Holy One is to gain understanding. I don't believe in coincidences and this book has really touched me, so if you are looking for a good read and are willing to sift through and glean from what has been written as a fiction novel, try reading "The Shack" by William P. Young.

The novel is set in the American Northwest. The main character is Mackenzie Philips, a father of five, called "Mack" by his family and friends.

Four years prior to the main events of the story, Mack takes his three youngest children on a camping trip to Wallowa Lake near Joseph, Oregon stopping at Multnomah Falls on the way. Two of his children are playing in a canoe when it flips and almost drowns Mack's son. Mack is able to save his son by leaving his youngest daughter Missy alone at their campsite. After Mack returns, he sees that Missy is missing. The police are called, and the family discovers that Missy has been abducted and murdered by a serial killer known as the "Little Ladykiller." The police find an abandoned shack in the woods where Missy was taken, but her body is never found. Mack's life sinks into what he calls "The Great Sadness."

At the beginning of the book, Mack receives a note in his mailbox from "Papa," saying that he would like to meet with Mack on that coming weekend at the shack. Mack is puzzled by the note - he has no relationship with his abusive father after Mack leaves home at age 13. He suspects that the note may be from God, whom his wife Nan refers to as "Papa."

Mack's family leaves to visit relatives and he goes alone to the shack, unsure of what he will see there. He arrives and finds nothing, but as he is leaving, the shack and its surroundings are supernaturally transformed into a lush and inviting scene. He enters the shack and encounters manifestations of the three persons of the Trinity. God the Father takes the form of an African American woman who calls herself Papa, Jesus Christ is a Middle-Eastern carpenter, and the Holy Spirit physically manifests itself as an Asian woman named Sarayu.

The bulk of the book narrates Mack's conversations with Papa, Jesus, and Sarayu as he comes to terms with Missy's death and his relationships with the three of them. Mack also has various experiences with each of them. Mack walks across a lake with Jesus, sees an image of his father in heaven with Sarayu, and has a conversation with Sophia, the personification of God's wisdom. At the end of his visit, Mack goes on a hike with Papa, who shows him where Missy's body was left in a cave.

After spending the weekend at the shack, Mack leaves and is so preoccupied with his thoughts that he is nearly killed in an automobile accident. After his recovery, he realizes that he did not in fact spend the weekend at the shack, but that his accident occurred on the same day that he arrived at the shack. He also leads the police to the cave which Papa revealed, and they find Missy's body still lying there. With the help of forensic evidence discovered at the scene, the Little Ladykiller is arrested and put on trial.

Next…

2010-06-07T01:33:00.001-02:00

I will be going for my 3rd of 4 chemo treatments left. I am so fatigued now, I am not looking forward to tomorrow. Pray for God's strength to get through the next 6 weeks. I will then take a short break before starting 33 radiation treatments.

Many have asked if that is the end but unfortunately I don't have that answer nor do my doctors. This will only be clear or clearer after my chemo is finished and more tests are run. I am asking for God to heal me but at the same time I am asking for His will to be done. Please pray with me.

Perdonanme- Aqui va el castellano de la Adriana

2010-05-20T10:24:00.001-02:00

Mi Querida Familia:

Perdonanmeque no siempre les escribo en espanol. Me mente esta frita con las quimios. El lunes fui al segundo tratamiento de quimo de la seguna ronda. Ahoa me esta quedando 2 tratamientos o mas o menos 8 semanas. Luego de eso empiezo con tratamientos de radiacion, un hysterectomia y tambien la reconstruccion de mis pechos.

Es extrano y chistos lo que te voy a contar, pero por inercia o habito cada rato trato sacar mi pelo de la cara...no tengo pelo! Debe ser una maña de que antes ne me di cuente.

Por for favor mandanme saludos. Paulo, Carmen y Viviana viajan en junio y/o julio y me haria tan feliz que ellos me trajeran cartas de bendiciones, fotos con comentarios y por supueto las copuchas. JA JA! Los quiero mucho y sepan que no estoy tan grave esta vez aunque sigo teniendo dolor, sigo adelante.

Muchas gracias por sus oraciones! Les amo demasiado a todos y cuanto me gustaria verlos.

Afectuosamente,
Adriana

Estas son fotos mas actuales de mi (hincada con ls esteroides y medicamentos. Me va costar un mundo en bajar pero ya me hecho el desafio. Sin comentarios por favor de este ya se como me veo. Ojala puedan ver la sonrisa y alegria en my cara estar junto a mi mama en el evento pasado- Relay for Life primero y Segundo de Mayo pasado.

Ronda #2, Tratamiento #2

2010-05-13T23:47:00.000-02:00

Gracias al Señor y todos los que han estando orando por mi, después de una semana infernal de dolor, me siento mucho mejor. Ya empecé la segunda ronda de quimo y el nuevo medicamento es súper fuerte. El Lunes voy al segundo tratamiento y me va ir quedando dos tratamientos más.

Por favor oren por mi mente ya que el solo pensar que el Lunes voy a sentir mucho dolor, me angustia. Creo firmemente que Dios me puede ayudar con los efectos segundarias y que no sienta tanto dolor.

Les amo y les extraño muchísimo. No voy a poder escribirles la semana que viene ya que hasta mis dedos y uñas se ponen sensibles. Suena raro pero es cierto. Cuanto me gustaría despertarme de esta pesadilla pero al mismo tiempo he aprendido tanto del Señor, su fidelidad, su propósito perfecto, etc.

Por favor mándenme muchos saludos esta próxima semana y palabras de aliento. Sus versículos favoritos siempre me llenan. ¡Cuanto los hecho de menos!

Besos y Abrazos,
Adriana

GARAGE SALE!

2010-05-13T12:57:00.000-02:00

Please spread the word...We are having a garage sale THIS SATURDAY all morning and afternoon long!

*** I'm going to be selling off a lot of my household items and furniture, I have in storage collecting dust! I also have school/teaching/home schooling items and clothes.

*** My parents and Emma have “stuff” they are selling.

*** My Relay for Life team has left over items from this years event to sell.

*** My sister is selling off her crazy romance and sci fi library among other things.

*** Our junk and dust collectors could be your treasure- Who knows?

*** Come by on Saturday AM and check it out. It is a neighborhood HOA event so you can check out my neighbor's junk too. LOL!

All funds I make are going towards a BRAC Analysis (genes test) and the biopsy of the cancer on my back. My wonderful and compassionate insurance has denied payment and we have already done the procedures. We’re back tracking and have to make payments on these ASAP.

This is our HOA’s neighborhood approved garage sale and boy do they ever bring out the goods. Our address is 1423 Sorento Cir.; West Melbourne- 32904. We are located in the Sheridan Lakes Home Division directly off of John Rhodes and at the west end of Sheridan Rd.

There is furniture, appliances, odds and ends, tools, you name it our neighborhood has it. PLEASE COME OUT!

Thank God It’s Friday: TGIF!

2010-05-07T22:25:00.001-02:00

Well, my first chemo for round 2 was a new medicine called, "Abraxane." I first felt it would kill me. I was not nauseous but every muscle, joint, bone, and skin screamed in pain. It was truly awful! My finger tips tingled like they were numb and ached as well, explaining my I haven't updated you on the great Relay for Life weekend we had or how I have been feeling. Please forgive me.

Relay Weekend

Our team goal as many of you know was $2,500, unfortunately we only raised three thousand, one hundred, and fifty-five dollars and fifty cents. Tricked ya', didn't I? I was able to walk around the lap once with my mom and friends' help during the Survivors lap. Everyone wanted me to go around in a wheelchair but my eternal strong will and maybe a little pride that keeps me going, revved up and I made it around and back to our campsite.

Our lap tracker fundraiser was a HUGE hit and made our site the hopping place to be, to pick up their beads with every lap they made. I made new friends from the American Cancer Society and also affirmed other friendships that barely existed.

Rebecca and David Nelson are friends I had from a Marriage Dynamics class I took and both shared with me in the Survivor's Luncheon. Rebecca is an Ovarian Cancer Survivor and took it upon herself and her family to stay all day and night supporting my team. Even after I had to leave at around 9pm they were there! Thank you, Nelson Family. Then the there was the Guadelupe's who set up tents from 9am and stayed 24 hours to show their support, selling items we had for sale and handing out beads. "Beads, beads, beads," cried out Kelly throughout the night. Thank you, Kelly, Nelson, Anthony, Chris and Ben! By the way, a great big wow to Anthony Guadelupe who walked an astounding 32 miles! And to Chris and Ben who at age 12 walked 12 miles. You boys are incredible!

Also true to their word were the Phelps: Gretchen, Page, Hezekiah, Eli, and Maggie. Right on time and through the afternoon's hottest temperature this gang kept walking around the track until they were all beet red! They too provided help collecting money and selling lap trackers and handing out beads. These 3 families will never know what their presence meant to me.

My mother's co-worker, Emily brought along her gang consisting of her, her husband, mom, her mom's friend, niece and friends. "Beads, Beads, Beads," were also her mother's words throughout the night. How cute!

Most of all to be thanked though was my family: my husband, his mother, my daughter, mom, dad, sister, my brother-in-law, my sister-in-law, and my niece. They were inspiring how they sweated before, during, and after the event. Thank you is not enough.

I LOVE YOU ALL! YOU made this event the success it was. For a first year team and our first event, I can't even imagine what next year will bring!

If you would like to take part next year, please let me know as our goal will be $5,000 with 20 team members. If you'd like to start your own team let me know as well. Our team goal is to help start 3 teams for next year and get more and more people personally involved!

This has been so therapeutic for me and kept my mind busy and engaged in finding a cure through the funds raised, I have to thank the ACS and above all else God. He is so wise in what he puts in our paths.

Anointing

Although I do not look forward to my 2^nd treatment on May 17^th of this second round of chemo, please pray for peace, strength, and faith. It was so incredible to have the deacons and Pastor Mark in our home on Wednesday this past week. The Lord's presence was felt distinctly as they anointed me with oil, laid hands on me and prayed for God's healing and will to be done in my life. Tears were shed, faith strengthened and a new lesson taught. Emma had never experienced something like this and I know it is something she will remember her entire life. Thank you to all the men present.

I can't say enough about what God continues to teach me and let me live every day. I end this blog with …

"Thank you, Lord for this cancer experience and for changing my heart each and every day! I love you!"

Faith the Size of a Mustard Seed- Thank You God!

2010-04-27T02:51:00.000-02:00

Feeling hopeful today. Still mixed emotions but on a better path than Sunday- It's because of your prayers. Thank You!

I feel pretty good today after my first dose of ABRAXANE treatments. There are 4 in total every 3 weeks. Then I'll have a month or so off to heal and I'll start radiation. There will be a total of 33 radiation treatments. One everyday M-F for 6 1/2 weeks.

I asked today how my Dr. would know if all this has helped and the answer was hard to hear..."Only time will tell." Once again m faith will be put the test, trusting God will cure me and living each moment as He has!

There are so many things we must have faith, even if only the size of a mustard seed- we can move mountains. Thank you God for putting that verse in the Bible.

I close today again thanking you for your prayers. I love you all, you are the people that keep me going.

Sleepy in Melbourne

2010-04-25T04:10:00.001-02:00

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Yes, it has been a long time. I decided at 1:52 AM after sleeping most of the day from 4 PM until now that maybe I should update everyone on how things are going. I'm through with my first round of chemo and on Monday I start round two. I cannot say I’m feeling very positive about it.

Overall I’m not feeling positive. I’m tired, fatigued, exhausted, limp, sleepy, worn-out, beat, drained, bushed, and weary. That’s all the synonyms I can think of. I’m also depressed, unhappy, glum, down in the dumps, sad, and well I give up on more synonyms. I don’t really have a reason, I just feel blue.

I promised to keep this blog positive but I also have to be truthful- I feel very alone. Facebook, blogging, e-mails, calls, and cards are great but sometimes you just NEED face to face fellowship with good friends. That’s where I’m at. If I hadn’t slept the afternoon away, I could have gone to Bible study but alas Sleeping Beauty was asleep. RATS!

Relay for Life is next weekend and I’m worried sick I won’t feel well. They are also predicting rain… pray it doesn’t rain! I need to have fun. Pray also that I will feel well.

Would it be crazy of me to go to Chile in July when my 2nd round of treatments are over? I have a month or a month and a half before I start with radiation. Should I go somewhere here in the states for a mini break? Any ideas? Anyone? Cheap is the word? Maybe a cruise? That’s cheap, right? LOL.

I blew up at my mom today and my husband every other day before that. Please pray for my emotions as I am crazed and plagued by many. Why do we always take things out on those we love the most? Why can I be such an idiot? Both very good questions?

Well I have left you with many questions to help me answer, so leave your comments. Of course, I expect them to be positive, seeing I’m lacking at this moment.

Today at Lunch!

2010-04-06T02:46:00.000-02:00

After my chemo treatment I went to lunch. Guess what? There was a group of about 50+ Seniors. I went to the director and asked if I could make an announcement and asked for donations....I received $94 in 5 minutes. Do NOT be afraid to ask, there are opportunities all around us. Just send me the checks made out to the... American Cancer Society and they will go towards my teams goal of $2,500!

It's so hard being so shy! LOL

The American Cancer Society - 2010 Relay For Life of Melbourne, FL:

2010-04-06T02:43:00.000-02:00

The American Cancer Society - 2010 Relay For Life of Melbourne, FL:

HELP!

2010-03-31T01:52:00.002-02:00

It may have been a long time since we talked but that doesn't mean you are not dear to my heart. Today I’m writing you to give up an update and ask you a small favor. I am at the halfway mark of my chemotherapy for Stage 4 metastatic breast cancer. What is that you ask?

Metastatic breast cancer is a complex multi-step process involving the expansion of cancerous cells from the breast to other areas of the body [in my case the lymph nodes and T-3 vertebrae in my back]. It is a serious complication of breast cancer, as metastatic disease in breast cancer is often fatal [ I refuse to be a statistic]… Breast cancer primarily metastasizes to the bone, lungs, regional lymph nodes, liver and to the brain, with the most common site being the bone[ mine has remained centralized right now to a small spot focalized in my T-3 only- Praise God!].

Enough mumbo-jumbo! I allowing God to do all the fighting, sitting back and letting Him do HIS will of healing and living every moment to the fullest for His glory and honor! Today I’m inviting you to join my Relay For Life® team, Butterflies of Hope and/or make a donation.

What is Relay for Life?

At Relay, teams of people camp out at a local high school- Melbourne High School Baseball Field- take turns walking or running around a track or path. Each team is asked to have a representative on the track at all times during the event. Because cancer never sleeps, Relays are overnight events up to 24 hours in length.

Each year, more than 3.5 million people in 5,000 communities in the United States, along with additional communities in 20 other countries, gather to take part in this global phenomenon and raise much-needed funds and awareness to save lives from cancer – LIKE ME! Thanks to Relay participants, the American Cancer Society continues to save lives.

Where do you come in?

I’m asking you to give up your Starbucks, McDonald’s, Coke, etc. for one week. That’s it! Instead put that money away in a jar or whatever and make a single donation by clicking the link on the side bar.

Every dollar helps me reach my personal goal of $500

and team goal of $2,500.

Please, Please, Please make a small effort to contribute. I know times are hard. Believe me, I KNOW! I’ve lost my home, declared bankruptcy, and am living with my parents…I know. I’m BEGGING you, do this for me. The American Cancer Society has done so much for me and this is my way of giving back .

Your small donation helps in creating a world where cancer never steals another year from anyone’s life, yes, that includes mine. I want to live and the efforts of this organization is making huge advances toward the future and my Emma.

I love you guys and am thankful to have you in my life.

Adrienne Conde

Butterflies of Hope, Team Captain

An Important Lesson Learned

2010-03-13T16:35:00.001-02:00

Time has gone on since my last entry, as if it would stand still because I have cancer. The LORD has been teaching me so much along the way. Most importantly is to stop, something I've struggled with my entire life.

"Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth."- Psalm 46:10

There are so many things I can't do right now, I'm forced to contemplate many hours as I try to get rest.

For one thing I was struck by the fact I've never personally carried a friend through a serious illness. I've known people who have been sick but I've never taken it upon myself to encourage them through this event: sending a card, visiting, calling, making meals, cleaning, and offering my whole self. It is so easy to demonstrate compassion at the moment someone is diagnosed but to be a Good Samaritan we've learned of in Sunday School and seeing someone through is difficult. You have your own life and concerns. Struggles another is going through quickly vanish in the sea of self. I confess this to you because I'm on the receiving end and wonder sometimes why I was so self-consumed and how these people do it to keep measly old me at the top of their list of priorities. I've always thought of myself as thoughtful. HAH! What a joke! It is so easy for me to come up with 10 people I've let down, it pierces my heart with guilt and shame.

Why would God give me what I haven't given to others? To have "a friend that sticks closer than a brother" is something real. It's something I've never been. Despite my shortcomings though, God blesses me with them. Thank you, Jesus.

I also have a family: a mother, a father, a sister, a husband, a daughter and so many more members that love me in ways I never realized. Every day is like an earthquake that shakes my very core and being. Again, why me? Why am I so blessed?

Some may think I'm crazy. How can she feel so blessed in the midst of this? It's incomprehensible but the Holy Spirit fills you in these times- if you would just let Him work in you. He gives you reasons to praise Him when on the outside, you may ask "Why do bad things happen to good people?" The answer is not hard to find, I am a child of the King. I've given myself to do whatever He pleases because the Father really does know best. God loves me intimately in every cell that makes up my being. How do I know, that I know, that I know? Because of YOU. My friends. My family.

Experiencing the Comforter calm my fears. The Healer touch my body and give me rest. The Deliver taking words I cannot utter to the very throne of God.

Have I changed? Yes. Has it been hard? Yes. Do I want to continue? That's hard to say. I don't wish upon myself cancer but through it I can see the makings of God so much clearer. I'm being still. I'm knowing God. My prayer is that you too would see Him more clearly as well and make decisive changes to be HIS face in the lives of others who so desperately need Him. I cry for those who do not know HIM and cannot fathom how they face every day. Send them a note, call, visit, clean their house, hug them, and show them God's face.

I would like to say a special thank you to Rachel (my baby sister) who has become my official secretary and driver. It never crossed my mind you'd ever have to take care of me, I could never ask for a better sister. I love you.

Sunday February 14th – Domingo 14 de febrero

2010-02-14T16:28:00.001-02:00

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El viernes pasado Adriana tuvo su primera sesión de quimoterapia. Como ustedes ya saben la biopsia de su espalda salió cancer positivo y la mando de cancer nivel II a nivel IV que es decir de más mucho más grave. Los estudios dicen que las posibilidades de sobrevivir disminuyen a un 20% pero sabemos que nuestra vida esta solamente en las manos de Dios, asi que rogamos que nos tengan en sus oraciones. En este momento Adriana ha pasado básicamente en reposo y durmiendo muchas horas debido a los medicamentos para controlar las nauseas que son uno de los efectos más graves de la quimoterapia, sabemos que los proximos días pueden ser mucho más complicados a medida que los medicamentos comiensen a trabajar en su cuerpo, por esto les pedimos que aparte de sanidad oren para que Dios la conforte.

Durante las última semanas Adriana no ha podido asistir muchas veces a la iglesia y hemos pasados varios domingo teniendo devocionales familiares y orando. Pero no hemos estado solos, muchas personas –de distintas iglesias- han venido a nuestra casa a visitarnos y orar por nosotros; por esta razón cuando Adriana se ha sentido mejor hemos podido visitar las iglesia de esas personas y alabar Dios con ellos. Les podemos decir que esta experiecia ha revolucionado nuestra idea de Juan 17:20-23, "ruego …para que sean perfectos en unidad, para que el mundo crea que me enviaste…" Cristo ora esta oración cerca del final de su ministerio –y su vida terrenal. ¿Por que? Porque es lo esencial. Jesus sabe que sin paz y harmonia en nuestras relaciones no podemos ser efectivos en ninguna area de nuestra vida especialmente en la esfera espiritual. Hermanos y hermanas de distintas congregaciones cuidandose y orando unos por otros como si fueran famila (porque los somos), matrimonios saludables que son ejemplos de tolerancia y entrega y padres dandoles a sus hijos el tiempo y cariño que necesitan son la demostración del Espíriu Santo en nuestras vidas y es lo que va a impactar a un mundo hambriento rde esperanza y propósito. Por lo que es Adriana, Emma y yo trataremos, apesar de nuestras imperfeciones, de vivir el resto de nuestras vidas en unida y armonia rogando a Dios por esa paz sobrenatural que solamante El da.

English

Last Friday Adrienne had her first chemotherapy session. As you already know the biopsy from her back came back positive which means her cancer is now stage IV instead of II. Needless to say this is much more serious . Some studies show this stage with 20% probability for survival, but we know our life is only in God's hands, so we ask you to keep us in your prayers. At this time Adrienne has spent most of her time resting and sleeping as result of the medications to prevent nausea, which is one of the most undesirable side effects of chemo. We know the next few days could be more difficult as the medications start working throughout her body. We ask that you pray now not only for her healing but that God comfort her during the coming days.

During the last weeks Adrienne hasn't been able to attend church on a weekly basis and we have spent many Sundays having devotional and prayer time. However we haven't been alone. Many people from different churches have come to visit us and pray for us. Because of this, when Adrienne has felt better we as well have visited their churches and worshiped together. This experience has transformed completely our concept of John 17:20-23, "I pray … may they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me." Christ prayed this near the end of His ministry –and His life. Why? Because it is essential. Jesus knows that without peace and harmony in our relationships we cannot be effective in any area of our life, especially in the spiritual. When the world sees a Christian brother and sister of different churches caring and praying for each other as a family (because we are one!) or healthy marriages that exemplified tolerance and unselfish love or parents giving their children the time and dedication they need, they are witnessing the expression of the Holy Spirit in our lives. That is what will impact a world that is hungry for hope and purpose. I don't about you but as for Adrienne, Emma and me we will try to live, regardless of our flaws, the rest of our lives in harmony and unity praying for the supernatural peace only God can give.

Quick Changes

2010-02-10T22:22:00.002-02:00

Everything I felt comfortable with was changed yesterday when my insurance denied my treatment at Moffitt. All the books I have read on treatments says you should feel 100% confident with where you get your treatment. I haven't even had time to wrap my head around the denial. With God's help I have accepted this decision and I begin with education tomorrow at the Rockledge Space Coast Cancer Center with Dr. Sprawls. The biopsy has come back positive as a metastatic lession from the original breast cancer. That also means I am in Stage IV. The information I have looked up shows this stage with a 20% probability of living through it. I want to beat those odds and with your prayers I know I will. I am still asking for God's will to be done but the Bible tells us to "ask and ye SHALL receive." I'm asking God for my life by faith. I know this is complicated but I do feel peace.

Friday I start chemo so remember to log on and check my status. I'd love it even more if you called or come by the house for the "Celebration of Life" party at 6:30 pm.

I love you all and thank you for your prayers,
Adrienne

Crying Out to God in the Wilderness

2010-02-09T23:09:00.001-02:00

I liked the doctor (Dr. R. Sprawls @ Space Coast Cancer Center) today and while in the office my insurance advocate (as if that is a real position) informed me she took my case to the medical director and they have denied my cancer treatment at Moffitt. I would love to scream and poor Pablo is holding back tears that just keep falling down his cheeks. Oh God, we are crying out. Please hear our prayers.

New news, but not really?

2010-02-08T22:11:00.001-02:00

Well exactly 19 days have passed since my last posting. There have been a lot of things done and yet there is no report of when any of my treatment will begin. Here's what I do know:

I saw my radiation oncologist, Dr. Eleanor Harris- Section Chief, Breast Gynecologic Clinical & Research Divisions, Clinical Director, Radiation Oncology and Residency Program Director, Radiation Oncology. Yeah that's right-
God chose the best for me!
There is a lesion on my back that is 99.9% a metastasis from the breast cancer. Biopsy results are pending but Dr. Harris feels like it will be something we treat after chemo is administrated.
I will spend 6 weeks in Tampa at the end of my chemo to receive 6 ½ weeks of radiation.
I'm looking for people to spend one week with me during radiation. So far I have Mom, Pablo, Patti, Beverly, and hey maybe you. Let me know.
I have my port for chemo placed. The tegaderm patch they used to cover it for the first 2 days has caused a severe allergic reaction. OUCH! ITCHY!
I am applying for gas money from cancercare.org .
I am applying for disability tomorrow. I have my interview with my case manager tomorrow 2/9 @ 10:30 am.
I have been able to reach a goal of $362 for a human hair wig. YEAH! Thanks to everyone who participated.
I'm applying for assistance with my co-pays until I reach my deductible of $2,500. If you know of a site let me know.
I'm also applying with the Jack and Jill Foundation. Look it up.
Waiting, Waiting, Waiting.

I really didn't like the oncologist here in Melbourne so I am now scheduled with one in Rockledge. I see him tomorrow. Please pray for wisdom in choosing someone local to care for me in emergency situations. I love you all, the posts, cards, visits, and phone calls have been a constant reminder I'm not in this alone. God is with me each step of the way and you are His human face of encouragement.

Thanks,

Adrienne

"Celebration of Life"

2010-02-08T20:59:00.000-02:00

Frustrated & Aggravated; Frustrada y Molesta

2010-01-20T02:46:00.001-02:00

Today did not go well. I went to Moffitt 2 hours away and the doctor couldn't tell me anything because they hadn't received all the reports. They couldn't give me any new info., what type of breast cancer I had, final report on my staging, when I'd start chemo, etc. needless to say I was frustrated. The appointment only served as a meet and greet and what seemed like a million more appointments and tests. I have tried to keep a positive attitude but I failed today. Pray for God's comfort that everything will get worked out soon and I would maintain myself calm. I go back Feb. 2 and hopefully then I will have more information. Sorry guy!

No me fue muy bien hoy. Fui al centro de cancer que queda como 2 horas de la casa y cuando vi a mi Dra. No tenia toda la informacion. Asi que no me pudo dar ninguna informacion nueva. Queria gritar y llorar al mismo tiempo. Hoy tenia que ser el dia que me iban a informar cuando empiezo el chemo, radiacion, el reporte final de que tipo de cancer a las mamas que tenia, etc. pero no fue asi. He tratado de manterme con una buena actitute pero hoy me fue MUY dificil. Tengo que hacerme mas examenes y ojala para el 2 de Febrero voy a ver la Dra. de nuevo. Siento tanta frustracion por favor oren que el Senor me de calma. Perdona mis faltas ortograficas estoy escribiendo este blog sin ayuda porque se que muchos estaban oren por mi hora hoy dia. Lo siento chiquios.

Una Paz que Sobrepasa Entendimiento

2010-01-19T01:37:00.002-02:00

He sabido que no sólo mis amigos y familiares están leyendo mi blog, sino que también sus familias y sus amigos. Si tú eres una de esas personas te pido disculpas por no presentarme al principio y explicarte un poco más de nuestra historia. Así es que…
A fines de los ’70 mis papás se mudaron desde Miami a Kissimmee, Florida, y para ser honesta es de este lugar del que tengo mis primeros recuerdos. Mi mamá solía llevarnos a la iglesia, pero comenzamos a asistir a un distinto tipo de Iglesia. Recuerdo que mi mamá nos sacó de la escuela pública y nos puso en la escuela Cristiana que tenía la iglesia. Mi papá estaba furioso cuando se enteró pues él no era del tipo religioso.
Nosotros oramos y oramos y pronto mi papá comenzó a acompañarnos a la Iglesia Bíblica Bautista. Todos nos conertimos, le pedimos a Jesús que entrara en nuestros corazones y perdonara nuestros pecados. Pero para mí este asunto de obtener la salvación fue más bien como una “poliza de seguro,” una amnistia para salvarme del infierno. Íbamos 3 ó 4 veces cada semana. Aprendí un montón acerca de la Biblia y cuando tenía 16 años, después de mudarnos a Melbourne, Florida, sentí que Dios me llamó a ser Misionera.
Asistí a la Universidad Bíblica Bautista en Springfield, Missouri, y aquí me di cuenta que convertirme en cristiana era más que un seguro de vida sino una relación personal con Jesús. En el segundo semestre le pedí a Jesús que entrara en mi corazón; Dios comenzó a ayudarme recordar todo lo que había aprendido en la iglesia y a aplicarlo; amar, perdonar, confesa, etc. Después de graduarme de la Universidad estuve como Misionera en Chile durante 8 años, lugar donde conocí a mi esposo y en el que nació mi hermosa hija Emma Marie.

Ahora, más cerca del presente es donde comienza mi jornada del cáncer. Mi compañera de primer año de la Universidad estaba embarazada de su tercer hijo, y en el quinto mes de embarazo fue diagnosticada con Cáncer de Mamas. Nunca me había hecho una mamografía (todavía éramos muy jóvenes). Dada la situación de Missy, opté por hacerme un chequeo.
Mi primera mamografía fue a comienzos del 2008 e indicó dos bultos en mi mama izquierda. En Abril me hicieron una Lumpectomía y GRACIAS A DIOS eran benignos (no cancerígenos).
Por ahí por Agosto del 2009, fui a mi chequeo femenino anual y me recordaron que necesitaba además hacerme una mamografía. Nuevamente encontraron dos bultos nuevos, pero fui donde mi cirujano general y él determinó que estas zonas eran más bien cicatrices; a esta situación también se sumo la presencia un nódulo linfático inflamado (yo no sabía nada sobre esto), que probablemente tenía que ver con mi sobrepeso. Todo lo demás estaba ok.
El 16 de Noviembre de 2009, el Lunes anterior al matrimonio de mi hermana y la semana justo anterior al Día de Acción de Gracias, sentí dos extensas masas en mi busto izquierdo mientras me duchaba. Intenté mantenerlo en secreto, pero por lo urgente que tuve que hacerme una nueva mamografía mi astuta madre se dio cuenta de que algo no andaba bien. Entonces le conté y comenzamos a orar.
La semana de Acción de Gracias llegó y el 30 de Noviembre me hice una biopsia guiada por ultrasonido en las dos masas y en un nódulo linfático. Créanme, esta vez estaba asustada. El 8 de Diciembre, justo un día antes de mi 35º cumpleaños, fui diagnosticada con un carcinoma invasive de estado avanzado y de alto grado, lo que equivale a un Cáncer de Mamas.
A este punto una deberia estár super intrigada con millones de preguntas y te puedo decir que nosotros las teníamos. ¿Por qué no fui diagnosticada antes? ¿Es esto negligencia médica? ¿Debería hacer una demanda? ¿Los doctores metieron la pata? Estas respuestas y muchas otras sólo Dios las tiene y solo Él tiene el control. Así que puse inmediatamente un alto a este tipo de preguntas.
“¿No estás asustada?” me preguntaron los que se atrevieron. Algunas veces sí, pero la mayor parte del tiempo me siento en paz. He aprendido tremendas lecciones. ¿Alguna vez has visto a dos niños peleando por un juguete? Bueno, esos somos Dios y yo. Tengo preocupaciones y he optado por entregárselas a Dios; pero a veces soy como una niña mimada que después de entregarle todas mis preocupaciones, al momento vas a pedirlas de vuelta. ¿Por qué?

Adivina que, yo me acabo de hacer la misma pregunta. Así es que decidí dejarle completamente esta carga llamada cáncer. Yo voy hacia Él para que me dirija “aunque ande en valle de sombra de muerte” (Salmos 23:4) porque Él es mucho mejor que yo para llevar esta carga. Es un hecho. Él es perfecto. Él es el único Dios vivo.

¡Guau! ¿Estás viendo lo mismo que yo? El Señor Jesucristo es mi Pastor (y cuidará que nada me falte) (Salmos 23:1).

Muchas preguntas enviadas por el mismo diablo han entrado en mi mente. ¿Qué pasaría con Pablo y Emma si es que yo muero? No estoy siendo pesimista, estoy siendo realista. A Pablo a vecesse le olvida darle el desayuno a Emma los sábados en la mañana y dice esas cosas que sólo los hombres pueden decir y que pueden dejar a los niños llorando. ¿Quién le va a comprar ropa decente a Pablo y le va a decir si se ve como un payaso o no? ¿Quién cortará su pelo? ¿Quién va a escuchar pacientemente su tremenda riqueza de conocimiento? ¿O lo animará a salir de su zona comodida?
Tu sabes lo que Dios dice, “Yuuujuuu, Adrienne, ellos no te pertenecen. Son un regalo que te di, pero han sido y serán por siempre míos. Yo soy Su pastor también. Siempre cuidaré de ellos y lo seguiré haciendo si tu vienes a vivir conmigo”.
Tengo la convicción de que ellos estarán bien. Es muy difícil de admitir pero ellos seguirán bien cuando yo no esté. Eso me trae paz. No lo puedo explicar. Sobrepasa mi propio entendimiento.
Filipenses 4:6-7
“Por nada estéis afanosos, sino sean conocidas vuestras peticiones delante de Dios en toda oración y ruego, con acción de gracias. Y la paz de Dios, que sobrepasa todo entendimiento, guardará vuestros corazones y vuestros pensamientos en Cristo Jesús”.

¡Por ahora me mantendré viviendo con esperanza, paz y risas confiando mi vida a la voluntad de Dios y viviendo al máximo! Recuerda, el Martes iré a visitar un Oncólogo al Centro de Cáncer Moffit, en Tampa – Florida. Ora para que Dios les de sabiduría a los doctores y escojan el mejor camino para mi tratamiento. Los amo a todos y he sentido vívidamente sus oraciones. Gracias.

--
Traducido por Romina Orellana Figueroa y Pablo Remonsellez

2010-01-14T23:23:00.001-02:00

Peace that passeth understanding!

LUEGO LO TRADUZCO A ESPANOL.
I’ve learned that not only are my friends and family reading my blog but also their friends and their families. If you’re one of those people, I apologize for not introducing myself in my first blog and explaining more thoroughly our story. So...
In the late 1970’s my parents moved from Miami to Kissimmee, FL and to be honest, it’s here where I have any early memories. My mom had always taken us to church, but we started attending a new kind of church. I remember when my mom took us out of public school and put us in the church’s school. My dad was furious when he found out, him not being the church going type.
We prayed and prayed and soon my dad joined us in attending Bible Baptist Church. All of us got saved (asked Jesus to come and dwell in our hearts and forgive us of our sins). But for me this getting saved business was more a fire policy or get of hell free card. Each week we went to church anywhere from 3 to 4 days. I learned a bunch about the Bible and at age 16, now living in Melbourne, FL I felt God wanted me to be a missionary.
I went to Baptist Bible College in Springfield, MO and here I realized being a Christian was more than insurance, it was a personal relationship with Jesus. I asked Jesus in my heart second semester and God began to bring all that I had learned in church to my memory and I started applying it. To trust, love, forgive, confess, change, etc. After graduating from college, I went to be a missionary in Chile for 8 years where I also met my husband gave birth to my gorgeous daughter Emma Marie.
Now closer to the present is where this cancer journey begins. My roommate from my freshman year at college was pregnant with her 3rd child and in the 5th month of her pregnancy. She was diagnosed with breast cancer. I had never gone to a get a mammogram – we were too young still. With Missy’s situation, I went to get checked.
My 1st mammogram in early 2008 indicated I had 2 lumps in my left breast. I had a lumpectomy in April and PRAISE God they were benign (not cancerous).
Flash forward August 2009, I went for my yearly female exam & was reminded I needed to follow up with a mammogram. Again they found 2 suspicious spots, but after going to my general surgeon he ruled the areas most likely were scar tissue and added a swollen lymph node (I had didn’t even know about) was most likely due to my being overweight. Everything was ok.
November 16, 2009, the Monday before my sister’s wedding and the week right before Thanksgiving, I felt two large masses on my left breast while showering. I tried to keep this under wraps but after suddenly having to go get another mammogram so soon; my ever so cunning mom figured out something was amiss. I told her and we began to pray.
Thanksgiving week went by and on November 30th, I had an ultra sound guided biopsy of the 2 masses and one lymph node. Believe me this was scary. On December 8, just one day before by 35th birthday, I was diagnosed with advanced state high grade invasive ductile carcinoma which equals breast cancer.
Now you’re caught up, but probably have a million questions I’m sure, we did. Why didn’t they catch this earlier? Is this malpractice? Should I sue? Did the Dr’s screw up? To these & many other questions, only God knows and He is in control. So I put a quick stop to where these questions were going.
“Aren’t you scared?” ask the brave enough to ask. Sometimes, but mostly I’m at peace. I have learned some enormous lessons. Have you ever seen two kids battling it out for one toy? Well, that’s God & me. I have worries and I give it to God, but I’m the spoiled brat who comes back time after time giving over my worries to God, wanting them back. He so very much wants to carry my burden and fears but I keeping coming back to Him trying to take them back. Why?
Guess what? I just asked that very same question. So I decided to let Him carry this load called cancer. I’m going to let Him lead me through “the valley of the shadows of death [and despair]” (Psalm 23:4) because He’s much better than I am at carrying this load. As a matter of fact, He’s perfect. He is the only living God.
Wow! Are you seeing what I see? The Lord Jesus Christ is my Shepherd (caretaker of worries) (Psalm 23:1).
More questions sent by the devil himself filled my mind. What’s going to happen to Pablo and Emma if I die? I’m not being negative, I’m being realistic. Pablo forgets to feed Emma breakfast on Saturday morning and says those things that only a man would say and makes by baby cry. Who is going to buy Pablo decent clothes or tell him if he looks like a clown or not? Who will cut his hair? Who is going to listen patiently to his enormous wealth of knowledge? Or encourage him to step out of his comfort zone?
You know what God said, “Yoo-hoo, Adrienne, they don’t belong to you. They are a gift I’ve given to you but they have always and forever will be mine. I am their Shepherd too. I have always taken care of them and will continue to do so even if you come to live with me.”
I have a firm faith they’ll do just fine. As hard as it is to admit, they’ll move on when I am gone. That brings me such peace. I cannot explain it. It passes my own understanding.

Philippians 4:6-7 6Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
7And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

For now I will just keep living with hope, peace, and laughter trusting in God’s will for my life and living it to the max! Remember, Tuesday I go see the oncologist at Moffitt Cancer Center in Tampa, FL. Pray for God’s wisdom to fall on the doctor to guide my treatment. I love you all and vividly feel your prayers. Thank you.

EXTRA: Dios quiere lo mejor para mi.

2010-01-04T00:16:00.001-02:00

En mi nota anterior les hablé acerca del libro que estoy leyendo, “El Señor es Mi Pastor (Spanish Edition)” escrito por Phillip Keller. Este ha sido una gran bendición para mi y mi madre que me lo ha estado leyendo. Su tema principal es la comparación entre nuestras vidas como cristianos y las ovejas. Dejenme compartir con ustedes que las ovejas son uno de los animales mas tontos y de cierta manera nos parecemos tanto a ellas que me hace reir lo estúpido que somos los humanos. ¿Por qué Dios eligió esta analogía vez tras vez en las Escrituras? Porque nos parecemos un montón ellas.

Desde que recibí mi diagnóstico he estado reflexionando mucho en mi vida, mis relaciones rotas, como la que tengo con mi hermano, y en como me convertí en la persona que soy hoy. ¿Qué he aprendido? Que tengo una obsession con el control. Incluso a veces trato de controlar mi Pastor, quien es el expert. Corrijo cosas, lo ignoro, cuestiono sus decisions e incluso me enojo por la manera que las cosas pasan. Necesito aprender a aceptar su voluntad ciegamente no importando cuan dificil o incomoda sea.

EXTRA: Dios quiere lo mejor para mi.

Yo se que esto puedo ser sorprendente para algunas de sus ovejas pero Él nunca ha dejado mi lado, nunca me ha puesto en situaciones que no me han hecho crecer o nunca me ha dejado tener relaciones que no me han enseño cosas increibles. ¿No es como obvio? Si no estas aprendiendo algo nuevo acerca de Dios déjame decirte que te estas paralizando espiritualmente. ¡No pares! De la misma manera como debes mantenente vigente en tu trabajo o profesión, aprendiendo en tu iglesia, escuchando mensajes, teniendo devocionales y leyendo libros escritos para ayudarte te mantendra en optima condición spiritual; Dios solo quiere lo mejor para ti …así que ¡Déjale dártelo!
Okay ya basta de Adrienne 101. Tengo buenas noticias: solo “El Doctor” lo sabe todo. Antes de mi cirugia mi cirujano estaba muy “preocupado” acerca de mi futuro porque mi cancer había llegado a mis gangleos. Él pensó que mi cancer ya estaba en Nivel 4 (Nota: Solo hay cinco niveles), lo cual no es para nada bueno. Cuando le pregunté derechamente ¿Voy a morir? su respuesta fue “Los resultados no prometen mucho. Estoy muy preocupado.” De nuevo la misma palabra. Sabes que significa realmente esa expresión, “No se que va a pasar, se tanto como tu y estoy tan asustado como tu”
Pero aquí viene la sorpresa, no estoy “preocupada”. “Mi Doctor” lo sabe todo y voy a confiar en Él. Después de la cirugía durante víspera de Año Nuevo mi cirujano llamó con un tono diferente. BUENAS NOTICIAS: Solo tres de los 12 gangleos tenían celulas cancerosas y estoy en nivel 2B. Todavía no he investigado que significa, pero ¿Es necesario? No creo.
¡DIOS SOLO QUIERE LO MEJOR PARA MI!
Me estoy sintiendo muy bien con algo de incomodidad y dolor como se esperaba. Las enfermeras que vienen a mi casa estan sorprendidas de lo bien que progreso. Lo cual no me sorprende porque tengo personas e Iglesias orando por mi literalmente por todo el mundo. ¿Qué sigue ahora? Voy el 5 a ver a mi cirujano para que me saquen los drenajes (Ouch!), después voy a ver al oncólogo de la clínica Moffitt el 19 y al oncólogo aquí en Melbourne el 26. Ya puedo recibir visitas pero no tengo muchas gans de hablar por teléfono. Así si quieres visitarme no dudes en hacerlo.

Dirección:
1423 Sorento Circle
West Melbourne, FL 32904 USA
Teléfono de CASA: 011 (321) 676-2160
Celulares:
Mom (Mamá)(Maria or Susie) (321) 298-0114
Dad (Papá)(Angel) (321) 298-6940
Hubby (Esposo)(Pablo) (321) 506-7991
Me (Adrienne) (321) 544-9361

ME MANTENDRÉ EN CONTACTO, PERO TAMBIÉN DEPENDE DE USTEDES
Mándenme un email, Facebook o hagan un comentario en my blog. Me encantan los recuerdos así que si tienes uno de nosotros, chistoso, emocionante o una foto, etc mándamelo. Ustedes son mi unica forma de entretenimiento.

TRADUCIDO POR MI ESPOSO QUERIDO

NEWSFLASH: God wants only the best for me.

2010-01-03T18:31:00.002-02:00

In my earlier note, I spoke about the book I’m reading, A Shepherd Looks At Psalm 23 by Phillip Keller. What a blessing it has been to me and now also to my mom who is reading it aloud to me. Its main topic is comparing our lives as Christians to that of sheep. Let me just share that sheep are some of the dumbest animals alive yet we are so like them it leaves me laughing at how STUPID humans are. Why did God chose this analogy time and time again throughout scripture? Because we are soooo like them.

Since my diagnosis I have been reflecting a whole lot on my life, my broken relationships like the one I have with my own brother and how I became the person I am today. What have I learned? I am a control freak. I even try to control my Shepherd the real expert. I correct things, I ignore Him, question His decisions until I go mad over the why’s and how comes. I need to learn to accept His will blindly following Him no matter how difficult or uncomfortable it is.

NEWSFLASH: God wants only the best for me.

I know this is shocking to some of His sheep but He has never left my side, put me in situations that won’t help me grow or allowed any relationship that won’t teach me something incredible. Can you say duh-uh with me? If you aren’t learning something new about God allow me to enlighten you. You are crippling yourself spiritually. Never stop! Just like your education in your field of work to stay at the top of your game; learning through church attendance and listening to messages, bible study, devotions, books written to help you grow…Stay on top off your spiritual life, God wants only the best for you…so let Him give it to you.

Okay enough of Adrienne 101, I have some crazy good news- only THE DOCTOR knows everything. Before surgery my surgeon was “concerned” about my future because my cancer had reached my lymph nodes. He thought that more than likely I was in Stage 4 (note: there are only 5 stages), not good. When I asked straightforwardly, “Am I going to die?” his response was “Yes, the results aren’t very promising. I’m really ‘concerned’?” There was that word again. Do you really know what that word means? “I dunno. Your guess is as good as mine and I’m just as scared about it as you are.”

But here’s the kicker, I’m not “concerned.” My DOCTOR does know and I’m going to trust in Him. Post-surgery on New Year’s Eve my great surgeon called me and changed his tune. GOOD NEWS: Only three of the 12 lymph nodes taken had cancer cell in them and I am in stage 2B. I still haven’t gotten around to looking this up. Is it really necessary? Nope.

GOD WANTS ONLY THE BEST FOR ME!

I’m feeling great with some discomfort which is expected. My home care nurses are shocked at well I am doing. Not a shocker to me I have people and churches literally all over the world praying for me. So where do I go from here? I go to see my surgeon the 5^th to get my drains taken out (ouch!), the oncologist at Moffitt the 19^th, and the oncologist here in Melbourne on the 26^th. I’m up for visitors but not really wanting to talk on the phone. So if you’d like to stop by, please do! No screaming children please. J Just kidding. Here is some info. you may need:

Address: 1423 Sorento Circle.

West Melbourne, FL 32904

Home phone: (321) 676-2160

Cell phones:

Mom (Maria or Susie) (321) 298-0114

Dad (Angel) (321) 298-6940

Hubby (Pablo) (321) 506-7991
Me (Sheep) (321) 544-9361

I’LL BE IN TOUCH , BUT REMEMBER IT GOES BOTH WAYS!

Drop me an e-mail, Facebook me, or make comments on my blog. I love to reminisce so tell me about a funny memory of us, a touching moment, a trip we went on, etc. or what about a funny photo. Be creative you are my only source or entertainment.